Boot camp begins..

Sunday 4^th January

I was feeling apprehensive about my first boot camp session with the personal trainer as I approached a gym I’d not been to before. I’m not very good when I’m out of my comfort zone I don’t really like meeting new people or making friends which people might be surprised to know as I am a outgoing person. I just don’t like new people. The room was half full of the people I’d expect to see using a personal trainer size 10s tanned in their lycra Nike matching outfits moaning that they’d put a few pounds on over Christmas. Personally they looked fine well they looked fantastic and defiantly don’t need a boot camp! Then there was a few others dressed in their baggy Primark tops looking a little rounder. Anyone over a size 12 has to opt for a baggy t shirt this is nothing attractive about trying to squeeze in any gym clothing made by Nike or adiadas when a xl is a size 12! 

I was defiantly the fattest there. I enjoyed it I worked hard and worked out bits I wouldn’t normally work. I was red and sweaty and minging. Glad I could not see a mirror! She gave us a pack to write down our food and I left feeling knackered but good.

Went to mum for Sunday dinner. She’d made swede mash for me as she knew I couldn’t eat a spud which is nice. At the end she realised she forgot to serve up the Yorkshire puddings so everybody sat around eating on gravy filled mini Yorkshire. Just before I was about to put it in my mouth my fella kindly said to me ‘should you be eating that’ I hadn’t even thought about not eating Yorkshire pudding. BOLLOCKS! He was right. I handed him my Yorkshire and stormed off in to the front room. Genuinely pissed off for at least half an hour. Bastard Yorkshire puddings!

Monday 5^th January

Fucking hell do I hurt today. Everything hurts. Can I just go back to bed?!  Oh no I need to go to my class!!

The class was full I could barely even lift my arms and I could see people from yesterdays bootcamp jumping around and shaking their thing like they don’t hurt at all!! But I kept pushing, kept shaking everything I could as much as possible!! Left fully knackered but feeling good. Feeling motivated!!

Tuesday 6^th January

Fuck, shit bollocks I went and gave in to some bloody chocolate caramel shortbread!! I’ve been so good but supporting a cooking lesson was just too hard!! It smelt so yummy and it was 11am just the right time for a little snack a roo! And it was good the buttery caramely chocolately goodness!! But I now I feel crap. I didn’t even have that much but I’m so annoyed at myself for it. Once I give in the cracks start appearing!! I will not do this!! No cracks I’m getting straight back on and going for a swim to try and swim it off.

How many lengths do you reckon I need to do to swim it off?? Hmm

Wednesday 7^th January

Still feeling motivated!! Feeling pretty damn good actually! And I made it to my favourite class. My favourite class is run by Kat the same lady that runs the boot camp. She’s a pint sized super fit lady that weighs about the same as my right thigh. She’s amazing and I think if anyone is going to get me thin it will be her! Her classes are fun and high impact all done through dance. She’s up beat positive and I genuinely want to go to her classes. The class is a good mix. There are the regulars. The token camp guy at the front with his neat groomed eyebrows and all round tan. He loves nothing more than to add extra moves like he’s dancing in a salsa bar on a Friday night. Watching every move in the mirror. Flamboyant and fabulous. Then there’s the mature ex dancer lady with buns of steel. Takes every move seriously making sure every movement is perfect. I imagine she’s got stories of how she nearly made it. There’s the bouncy Chinese lady who’s super fit and always gives it 110% in her luminous yellow vest. Should you wear illumines colours if your over 14? And there are the 2 elderly ladies, one with her blonde hair extensions and high top trainers the other in her zumba vest. Both go to the gym a few times a day asking the young gym instructors about how their family are and what their up to this weekend. I’m not sure if they ever leave the building. Maybe they live in the basement. Then there’s just a mixed bag of all shapes and size. All abilities A few teenagers with their toned stomach cropped tops and hot pants on!. Even a man with one leg!( who keeps up just as well as everybody else) Now I’ve been going to these classes with these people on and off for years and strangely enough I’m not a talker. I don’t mingle but these regulars I’ve explained may seem a certain way at first glance but they are a very friendly bunch. They often make the effort to smile or have a little chit chat if I’m waiting on my own. It’s a nice little exercising community.

Thursday 8^th January

Hit a massive low tonight. My birthday skirt has arrived and it doesn’t fit. I knew it when I looked at it. Wishful thinking that I could squeeze in to it and I tried! I’m always in between sizes that’s why internet shopping is risky. Why can you fit in one size in one shop and then not fit in it at all in another shop? Sometimes not even close!!

I feel crap and emotional. Really upset just over a skirt. Sometimes it can just take a little thing to throw you and make you feel so crap. It’s hard to describe these days where sometimes my weight can make me feel so shity and other days it doesn’t really bother you.

Today I feel horrible.

Friday 9^th January

This morning I woke up less bloated I actually felt thinner. I thought bugger it I’m trying on the skirt again! And it bloody fit! Zip all the way to the top and everything!! Don’t get me wrong it is snug and I’ve still got a way to go before I try it on but I felt good. Maybe the morning bedroom exercise helped ;)

Friday night is treat night. My personal trainer told us its important to have treat night. Anything you’ve fancied all week, have on treat night. She actually said we can have a treat day if we wanted but I’m pretty sure stuffing my face with crisps and chocolate all day would not be helpful! She also said don’t crazy which is the bit I need to focus on. Self control is not something I’m good at.  We’d been talking about it all week what we were going to have for treat night and after many thoughts of pizza and kebab we decided on Chinese. A nice Chinese take away watching the season finale of breaking bad. Cracking night!!

Saturday 10^th January

Feeling a little guilty after last night’s Chinese (which may have been on the border line of stuffing my face) I opted for a morning power walk. Well my plan was to power walk!! The park was crazily muddy so every time I tried to pick up pace I skidded around everywhere so I just tried to do lots of walking without falling on my face!! A couple jogged past me. How are they jogging?

I how are they not skidding around like me? Pah stupid joggers.